Philokalia Ministries — Father Charbel Abernethy - continued

The asceticism is severe because the mercy is immense.
The Fathers are ruthless toward everything that diminishes the human person because they have seen something of what the human person may become in God.
Repentance is therefore not the destruction of the self.
It is its resurrection.
Slowly, sometimes almost imperceptibly, fear begins to change.
The person who once asked, Have I done enough not to be condemned? begins to ask another question:
How could God love us so much?
And something entirely different awakens in the heart.
Wonder.
Then desire.
The soul begins to discover that Christianity is not finally about escaping punishment. It is about communion. It is about becoming capable of receiving the Love that has been pouring itself out upon us from the beginning.
This is the world of Isaac.
The deeper he descends into repentance, the more astonished he becomes by mercy. The more clearly, he sees human weakness, the more incomprehensible the compassion of God appears.
Eventually the heart can do little except marvel.
Perhaps this is one of the deepest signs that repentance is becoming mature.
We begin with tears over ourselves.
We end with wonder before God.
And somewhere along that road fear loosens its grip.
The heart discovers that God was never the enemy from whom it needed protection.
He was the Physician standing beside the wound.
He was the Shepherd searching the wilderness.
He was the Father watching the road.
He was Christ descending into our darkness to bring us home.
Then repentance itself becomes beautiful.
Not easy.
Not painless.
But beautiful.
Because repentance is no longer the desperate attempt to persuade God to have mercy upon us.
It is finally allowing ourselves to be found by the mercy that has never ceased seeking us.